(gentle music) (film reel rolling) (triumphant western music) ♪ Love in the country ♪ ♪ Where skies are blue ♪ ♪ All you'll be dreamin of ♪ ♪ Are the birds and the bees ♪ ♪ And the flowers and the trees ♪ ♪ Till you're up to your knees in love ♪ ♪ There's a treehouse in the meadow ♪ ♪ Below the mountain peak ♪ ♪ The perfect place for lovin ♪ ♪ Is when they play hide and seek ♪ ♪ There's a covered bridge at Cripple Crick ♪ ♪ Where the horses always stop ♪ ♪ Tween the treehouse and the covered bridge ♪ ♪ That's how Mom won Pop ♪ ♪ Love in the country ♪ ♪ Where skies are blue ♪ ♪ All you'll be dreamin of ♪ ♪ Are the birds and the bees ♪ ♪ And the flowers and the trees ♪ ♪ Till you're up to your knees in love ♪ ♪ There are roses on the trellis ♪ ♪ And the scent of new-mown hay ♪ ♪ The clingin' vine is jealous ♪ ♪ On the fence across the way ♪ ♪ There's a great big yellow moon above ♪ ♪ And a breeze to sing a song ♪ ♪ Tween the roses and the yellow moon ♪ ♪ A fella can't go wrong ♪ ♪ If he makes love in the country ♪ ♪ Where skies are blue ♪ ♪ All you'll be dreaming of ♪ ♪ Are the birds and the bees ♪ ♪ And the flowers and the trees ♪ ♪ Till you're up to your knees in love ♪ (sprightly western music) (children shouting) >> Lord to goodness.

Not again.

(horse neighs) >> Howdy Drago!

>> Mornin' Curly.

>> Makes seven times this month he come home swoggled.

>> Six.

>> Seven.

>> Six.

Once was his birthday, that don't count.

Gimme my bucket.

Didn't have anything for breakfast but two raw eggs and a mug of honey.

>> No.

>> Curly.

>> Yes, boss?

>> Don't say it's a fine morning, or I'll shoot ya.

Get out of here, Bunion.

(cow moos) Good morning.

>> Children: Good morning.

>> Arless, what are you doin up there?

>> I hope I get it this time, Mr. McLintock!

My brothers, they got the big hats already!

>> All right, let 'em have at it!

(gun fires) (exciting upbeat music) (children clamoring) >> Get over!

>> You gonna let me drive?

You promised me you would sometime.

>> No!

Yah!

>> Hoss, you better watch that turn on the road!

You're gonna kill both of us, one of these days.

>> Thank you, Mr. Boss!

(exciting western music) (cattle mooing) >> You got cattle in the back, boss.

(cattle mooing loudly) >> Yah!

Give it up, yah!

(cattle mooing chaotically) (horses neigh) >> Keep 'em goin!

15 cents a pound, all the way to Kansas City.

Yah!

Yah!

(upbeat dramatic western music) >> Now boss, there's one old pensioner I wished you would pass up.

>> Bunny?

>> Yeah.

>> I knew where I'd seen his face before.

>> He ain't an old time, he's just been around town a couple of years.

>> Oh, you have no milk of human kindness.

>> Mornin', Mr. McLinny!

>> Morning, Bunny!

>> Well, I can see you're in good health!

>> Never felt better!

Contrary to what you may hear.

>> Me, my kidneys ain't what they used to be, and my liver's been leavin me billies.

>> Drago.

>> Eeyyy.

(coin clinks) >> Hello, Ben.

>> Hey, McLintock.

>> Drago, throw that in the buggy.

>> Yes, sir.

>> That's a scrubby bunch of Sooners, huh?

>> They are at that.

>> That oughta make Douglas happy, lining his pockets with land fees.

>> What are we gonna do?

>> I don't know what you're gonna do, Ben.

Me, I do nothing.

>> 200 families.

Quarter of beef a week, per family?

They last two years, that can be a sizable number.

>> I got 20 head to one of any other brand on the Mesa Verde, I'm not hollerin.

>> Some of us haven't got all the money in the world.

Some of us ain't old and tired, and feel like being put upon.

>> You interest me, young Ben.

Go on.

>> The first time I find one of our hides wearin our brand, hung on one of them settler's fences, I aim to kill me a powboy.

>> You do what you want, McLintock.

We'll do what we want.

>> Fellas my age generally call me GW, or McLintock.

Youngers call me Mr. McLintock.

>> All right, Mr. McLintock.

Not because I'm afraid of ya.

You're the big yeast out in this country.

I reckon a fellow my age should call you mister.

>> Full grown now, GW.

He's a half-owner of the spread.

>> I made him a full partner, the day the doc gave me the long face.

>> Well you want him to vote, the first time this territory becomes a state, don't ya?

>> Course I do.

>> These settlers get burned out, there'll be a lot of hollerin that this country's too wild to be a state.

We'll go on being a territory some more, with a lot of political appointees runnin it, according to what they learned in some college, where they think that cows are something you milk, Indians are somethin in front of a cigar store.

(laughing) I'm lookin to you to hold young Ben down.

>> I'll do what I can.

(train whistles) >> Come over to the house once in a while, we'll rack up a few hands of stud.

>> GW, that'll be just fine.

(train bell dinging) (men shouting at cows) >> It's a nice mornin, ain't it boss?

>> Everybody's entitled to their own opinion.

>> Like that again, eh?

>> Here's somethin that'll cheer you up.

About a thousand head, I figured they'll bring about 12.50.

>> They're not as fat as I'd like to ship.

They all off the north range?

>> Yes.

>> Settlers, every one of em with a plow and a Bible, not the slightest idea what the range is for.

>> Drago!

Drag out that hog leg.

>> Yes sir!

>> Get me some attention.

(gun fires) >> Yee haw!

People, people, people!

People!

Come on, all of ya!

Gather round!

People, come on!

Gather round.

>> I'm McLintock.

You people plan to homestead and farm the Mesa Verde.

>> Yes, sir!

The government gave us each 160 acres.

>> The government never gave anybody anything!

Some years back, a lot like you came in.

Had a purdy good first year, good summer, easy winter.

But the next year, the last rain was in February.

And by June, even the jackrabbits had sense enough to get off the Mesa.

>> Folks, do you know who that is?

That's McLintock!

George Washington McLintock!

>> I told 'em that, Douglas.

>> He controls the water rights on 200 square miles of range.

You know that lumber you got?

It came from his land.

Cut by his loggers, and milled in his mills.

>> Douglas, I come close to killin you a couple of times when we were younger.

Saddens me I didn't.

>> Can you imagine a man who owns all that, oh and mines too, I forgot to mention them, all that, and he's begrudging poor people a measly, a measly 160 acres.

>> That right, Mr. McLintock?

You begrudge us a little free land?

>> There's no such thing as free land.

You make these homesteads go, you'll have earned every acre of it.

But ya just can't make em go on the Mesa Verde!

God made that country for buffalo.

Serves pretty well for cattle.

But it hates the plow.

And even the government should know, that you can't farm 6,000 feet above sea level!

>> Any trouble, Mr. McLintock?

>> No trouble, Jeff.

(cattle mooing) >> How about you, Douglas?

>> Douglas?

Just plain Douglas, eh?

>> And you call him Mr. McLintock?

Why?

>> Well Douglas, I guess it's because he earned it.

(horse neighs) >> Mr. McLintock?

>> Yeah?

>> I'm a good hand with cattle, Mr. McLintock.

I'd like a job.

>> Well, you look strong enough.

You come in with those Sooners?

Well, yes sir, but we don't have a homestead and- >> Can't use ya.

(train chugging) >> Tough life, ain't it, sonny?

>> Well, ain't much use to bein a farmer around these parts!

(upbeat fiddle music) (cheerful western music) >> Ladies, this is the finest Chan-tillie lace available anywhere!

>> Chantille, Mr. Birnbaum.

>> Well believe me, it's the best!

Oh, excuse me, please.

Look around, take your time.

Drago, I got a thousand Havana cigars, and 12 of those hats for ya over there.

>> Well, 12 big hats ain't gonna last long, the way some folks have been dipperin into that red eye these days.

>> Uh oh.

>> Good morning, GW!

>> Good morning, I stole some stick candy.

>> Please, help yourself!

Come on in!

Davey, you can forget about saddling up the horse!

Come in here!

>> Problem?

>> Yes.

>> Well if I were blacks, I'd move queen's bishop to king four.

(chess piece clicks) >> Yeah.

You might be right.

You know I'm just starting to work this out, when the letter came!

>> Letter?

>> What's happened?

What you want- Morning, Mr. McLintock!

>> Morning, Davey.

>> You being here saved me a trip!

Oh, that hat and suit of clothes you picked out for my birthday?

Well, instead of this cowboy hat, I'd like to have this one, if it's all right with you, sir.

>> Well, it's all right with me, Davey.

Course, that looks like the kind of a hat that a fella'd wear down Main Street, to start a fight!

>> Oh, I don't need a city hat for that, all I have to do is walk down the street, and some wiseacre will call me an Indian, and just like that, the fight's on!

>> Davey!

The letter, it's for you.

And you are an Indian!

>> Yes, I know I'm an Indian.

But I'm also the fastest runner in town!

I've got a college education, and I'm the railroad calligrapher!

But does anybody say, Hello, college man, or, Hello runner, or, Hello calligrapher, No!

Not even, Hello, knothead!

>> Davey.

>> It's always, Let the Indian do it!

>> Will you go out in the store and help the ladies?

>> All right.

I'm also bookkeeper!

Part time clerk.

Always let the Indian do it.

>> Lady brought that out here this morning, asked for it to be taken out to the home ranch for ya.

Handsome lady, kinda tall, with red hair.

Called me Mr. Birnbaum, just as if she'd never seen me before, and as if that veil that covered her face would keep me from recognizing her.

I thought she was in New York, or Europe or someplace.

>> So did I.

>> Jake, you better throw on a couple of extra cases of the boss's favorite bourbon.

That stuff sure gets used up fast out at our place.

>> Which reminds me, you better start taperin' off.

>> Huh!

>> Katherine's in town.

>> Katie?

(upbeat clarinet music) >> Ladies.

Mornin.

>> Morning, Mr. McLintock.

>> Morning, Mr. McLintock!

>> Morning, gentlemen.

(triumphant horn solo) >> Good morning.

>> Good morning, Mac!

>> Hello, darling.

>> Bottle of rye.

>> Morning, GW.

>> What are you doin in here?

Why aren't you out at the desk?

>> Helpin out the bartender.

>> Yeah, I see a busy day.

Gimme the key to room 17.

>> What?

>> 17, and don't advertise it.

>> Here they come, Mr. McLintock.

(doors slapping) >> Set 'em up!

>> Beer!

>> Whiskey!

(glasses thud) >> Day off?

>> Off day.

>> Wonder what he's so preoccupied about?

>> Haven't you heard?

>> No, what?

>> Katie's back in town.

>> Katie?

>> Yes, dear.

The social arbiter.

(girls laughing) >> Well, hi Sonny.

>> Good morning, oh!

(girls laughing) >> He sure is a quiet one!

>> Mr. McLintock, I don't wanna bother you- >> I'm sorry boy, I told ya, no job.

(triumphant western music) (lock clicks) (drops hat) (door shuts) >> Katherine.

>> George Washington McLintock.

(soulful country music) >> I thought you'd want this!

(bottle clinks) >> First dig of the spur.

But, who am I to upset your plans?

Don't you feel kinda silly?

>> I never feel silly!

>> That's because you have no sense of humor.

Why couldn't we sit down in the hotel dining room, and talk about whatever it is you wanna talk about?

Or why couldn't ya just come over to the house?

>> And have everybody know that we're meeting?

>> Everybody knows!

And what's the difference?

We're married!

>> That is something I should like to change.

(paper flaps) >> You know the answer, Katie.

That isn't why you sent for me.

Let's get to the rat killin.

>> That's just the kind of remark that's always endeared you to me.

>> Let us open the discussion.

>> Very well.

Our daughter is coming home in a few days, rather, she's coming here, it was just a slip of the tongue, that made me refer to this ugly hamlet, as home.

>> Our daughter?

>> Is it so hard to say her name?

It's Becky.

>> Rebecca!

I hate that name!

Anyway, she's coming home.

And I hope to persuade you to let her live with me.

Part of the time in the capitol, part of the time in New York, and, of course, Newport during the season.

>> You're whistling in the wind, Katie.

>> If she stays here, she'll become just as crude and as vulgar as all of this country!

>> And if she goes your way, she'll be all show, and no stay.

>> Oh!

>> No go, Kate.

>> I hate you!

Oh, how I hate you!

>> Half the people in the world are women.

(slams door) Why does it have to be you that stirs me?

>> You animal!

>> That's the story.

>> I saw your picture in the paper at the Governor's Ball.

You were dancing with the Governor.

>> Well, at least he's a gentleman!

>> I doubt that.

You have to be a man first, before you're a gentleman.

He misses on both counts.

(slams door) (sorrowful music) (spurs clink) >> Hey, Sonny!

You gonna ask him again?

>> Nope.

>> Hey, boy.

You gotta pocket your pride.

You gotta beg.

You better listen to an expert, Sonny!

I'm telling ya!

Ya got to grovel, human nature!

Gets 'em every time!

>> Mister, leave me alone.

>> Everybody does it, one way or another.

(cackles) >> About that job, Mr. McLintock- >> I already told you, son, I've got no need for farmers, or use for 'em.

>> Just one minute, Mr. McLintock.

My father died last month.

That's how come we lost our homestead.

I've got a mother, and a little sister to feed.

I need that job badly.

>> What's your name?

>> Devlin Warren.

>> Well, you got a job, son.

>> See my home ranch barman, he's over at the corral.

(laughing) >> Step down offa that carriage, mister!

(horse neighs) >> Hold that hog leg!

>> I've been punched many a time in my life, but never for hiring anybody!

>> Aw, I dunno what to say.

Never begged before.

Turns my stomach.

I suppose I should have been grateful you gave me the job.

>> Gave?

>> Boy, you got it all wrong.

I don't give jobs, I hire men.

>> You intend to give this man a full day's work, don't ya, boy?

>> You mean you're still hiring me, Mr. McLintock?

Well, yes sir, I mean, I'll certainly deliver a fair day's work.

>> For that, I'll pay you a fair day's wage.

You won't give me anything, and I won't give you anything.

We both hold up our heads.

Where do ya live?

>> The settler's encampment, down by the mine.

>> That's your plug?

>> Yes, sir.

>> Well hop on him, and we'll go get your gear.

(triumphant horn music) >> McLintock: Yah!

Yah!

(upbeat western music) >> Mornin', Mr. McLintock!

>> Morning, Mr. Poorboy!

(upbeat western music) >> I'm sure that all you fine people, are interested in knowing just what portion of this new land will be your new home.

Oh, Jones and McAllister, since you've been more or less the leaders of our group, I'd like to have you come up and check the exact location.

>> Won't be a minute, sir.

>> Go up to that boy, and give him $30.

Tell him McLintock pays his riders a month in advance.

>> From the looks of things, they could sure use it, too.

>> Oh, Mom?

It's Mr. Drago.

>> Mornin'.

>> Well, and to what do we owe this visit from the cattle baron?

>> I've got a touch of hangover, bureaucrat.

Don't push me.

>> Woohoo, Maclan!

>> Say, those are Indians!

Are there Indians in this homestead land?

>> Friendly Indians, my boy.

>> Oho, Maclan!

>> Oh, Running Buffalo.

>> Oh, Maclan.

Long time, we no get drunk together.

>> And it's gonna be a lot longer time.

'Cause it's against the law, and you're with a sheriff.

>> And have I got my hands full.

They came into town to meet the train.

The old Indian chiefs are coming home.

>> I heard they'd been pardoned.

>> They don't know when it's arrivin.

This week, next week, or next month, so in the meantime, I've got to do somethin with 'em.

Could I cut out a couple head of your steers to feed them?

Otherwise, some of these settlers milk cows are gonna disappear.

>> That's right, Maclan!

(laughing) >> Cut out whatever you need.

>> Sheriff, are you gonna camp these savages with all these settlers?

>> You are asking for trouble!

>> Mr. Douglas, I already have plenty of trouble.

Please stay off my back.

Running Buffalo, bring your people over to the clay slide!

(Running Buffalo calling) >> Hello, Mr. Maclan.

>> Tiny Mouth!

It's nice to see you!

You wouldn't believe it now, but 20 years ago, she was a mighty handsome maid.

>> 20 years ago, you thought so too, Mr. Douglas!

(coughing nervously) >> It was just like this, I had a dead beat on old Running Buffalo, and my sharp 50 caliber misfired.

It's about that trouble in the '40s.

Member?

>> I remember.

>> Hey, you want tell ya something come directly from him?

>> No.

Where'd you get this?

>> That boy's Mama baked 'em!

You thinkin' the same thing I am?

She's a widow woman, boss, and she's got a long, hard road home.

>> Hire her.

(happy music) >> I always said you had a heap of sense.

>> Mr. McLintock, this is my mother.

>> Your mother?

>> And my sister.

>> Pleased to meet you, Mr. McLintock.

>> Ma'am, this here's my boss, and he has a few choice words to say about your biscuits.

>> Yes, Mr. McLintock?

>> They're great!

(tense string music) >> Well, you old Cantonese reprobate, how about it?

>> Fire me?

I kill myself!

>> I'm not talking about firin ya, I'm retiring ya!

You been rustlin food for us for 30 years!

We're gonna put you out to pasture.

All you'll have to do is give advice, be one of the family.

>> I kill myself!

>> I may save you the trouble.

>> But Ching, if you kill yourself, I'll cut off your pigtail, and you ain't never gonna get to heaven.

>> I'll be one of the family?

>> I give you my solemn word.

>> Pretty crummy family.

Drink too muches.

Get in fight.

Yell all the time.

>> Cut off his pigtail.

>> All right, all right, I'll be one of a family.

(muttering in Cantonese) (dishes clinking) >> This is such a big house, it'll take me a while to get used to things.

Now please don't hesitate to tell me if anything is wrong.

>> No Bird's Nest Soup.

Otherwise just fine!

Everything nice and fine!

>> Food's heaven, ma'am!

>> Best apple pie I ever et.

>> Curly's right, ma'am.

Hated to leave that last bite.

Shall we celebrate with a drink?

Boys, come and help me with the dishes.

Alice, you wanna help too?

>> Yes, Drago.

>> All right.

Now I'll wash, and you kids gonna dry.

Is that good to you?

>> It don't seem possible one woman could use all them clothes!

>> You keep a civil tongue in your un-prepossessing face!

>> Yes, ma'am.

>> And unload my baggage, please!

>> Yes, ma'am.

>> By the way, what does that word, un-prepossessing, mean?

(crickets chirping) >> Mrs. McLintock!

>> Oh, hello Carlos.

Run and help the driver with my luggage.

I couldn't trust anyone else in this house to do anything correctly!

>> Luggage?

Give 'em a hand, Curly.

>> Yes, boss.

>> Miss McLintock, are you moving back in?

>> Yes, but nothing has changed except my place of residence!

And I'd be willing to put up with savages, rather than be denied the company of my daughter!

And I'm proving that by moving in here!

>> Mr. McLintock, since it's my first day, would you excuse me if I- >> Go ahead.

>> Oh Katherine, this is Dev Warren, joined the outfit today.

>> Pleased, ma'am.

>> Thank you.

Well, how refreshing.

A polite young man, here.

Where did he come from?

>> He's a farmer.

>> A farmer?

>> Well, I'll be doggone.

Kate, welcome home!

>> What on earth are you doing in that idiotic-looking outfit?

And don't you dare call me Kate!

>> That's my buttonin suit, I'm buttonin for the boss.

And I'm sorry, Katherine, that Kate kinda slipped out, from the times I remembered you as being nice people.

(Katherine gasps) >> Are you going to stand there, with that stupid look on your face, while the hired help insults your wife!

>> He's just ignorant, he doesn't know any better than to tell the truth!

And I can't help this stupid look, I started acquiring it as you gained in social prominence.

>> Mrs. McLintock, where do you want I should- >> Put 'em in the master bedroom.

(dramatic music) >> Yes, but move Mr. McLintock's things into another room!

The one back of the stairs would be best, so that he can't wake up the entire household when he comes home every night, just before daybreak!

>> Yes, ma'am!

(playful music) >> Oh, excuse me.

Here's your cigars, Mr. McLintock.

>> I am Mrs. McLintock.

>> Kate, I mean Katherine, this is the cook- This is the lady that does the cooking for us.

>> Mrs. Warren, Mrs. McLintock.

>> How do you do?

>> Very pleased to meet you, Mrs. McLintock, very pleased.

>> Likewise.

>> You see, I just came to work here today, and I guess I jumped to the conclusion that this was a bachelor's household.

(laughing softly) >> It is, and then again, it isn't.

I will explain, so everything will be quite clear, Mrs. Wallace.

>> Everyone: Mrs. Warren.

>> Mrs. Warren.

It has been a bachelor's household for quite some time.

And it will be again, just as soon as I am out of here.

Which will be as quickly as I can make arrangements to take my daughter back east with me.

You see, she's coming home from school in a few days, and then we'll be off together, and you can return to conducting yourself as you consider proper in a bachelor's household.

>> Katie!

>> Shut up!

Until then, I am mistress in this house.

And I will give the orders!

I want my breakfast served in bed.

>> Ain't you gonna say nothin, boss?

>> No.

>> One poached egg, tea, toast.

Oh, GW, as soon as my things are put away, I want to talk to you about Rebecca.

>> Yes, Mrs. McLintock.

Indeed, Mrs. McLintock.

Of course, Mrs. McLintock.

>> The toast, lightly browned and unbuttered.

>> Of course, ma'am.

>> What was that, boss?

Where you think you're goin'?

>> I just remembered I got a date.

>> But she said she wanna have a talk with you.

>> I heard.

(door shutting) >> Good evening, Lem.

>> Good evening, Mr. Mac.

Say, Mr. Mac, what does un-prepossessing mean?

>> I was called that once, Lem.

Looked it up in the dictionary.

It's best you don't know what it means.

>> Uh huh.

Thank you.

Giddup!

(carriage clatters) >> Hey!

What am I gonna tell her, when she asks where you went?

>> When in doubt, tell the truth.

She wouldn't expect that from you, anyway.

>> Where's Mr. McLintock goin?

>> There he goes, burnin his last bridge.

You see a yellow streak about a foot wide, runnin up and down his backbone?

>> On Mr. McLintock?

He ain't afraid of nothin'.

>> I once thought that.

(crickets chirping) >> Drago.

>> Yes ma'am.

>> Was that- >> He took off, lit out.

>> I told him I wanted to talk to him!

>> Yes ma'am, I was standin' right over here when you said it, and I was standing right out there on those front steps, when he walked up to the horse, grabbed a hunk of mane, stepped up on him, and sunk spur.

>> Where did he go?

>> Last time I saw him, he's goin' east, but you know him, he's liable to go north, south, or west.

>> Get me a carriage.

>> Yes ma'am, but- >> But what?

>> Maybe you shouldn't follow him into maybe where he's goin' into.

>> What does that mean?

>> I dunno, but I wish I hadn't a said it.

>> Well, just get the carriage.

>> Yes, ma'am.

>> What happened?

>> Get the barouche.

>> Barouche?

>> Hitch it up, she wants to go to town.

>> But Mr. McLintock never said anything to me about it!

>> Look, young fella, I'm the, I'm the ramrod around this place, and you better start giving me a, Yes, sir, or you're gonna get the roof of this house pulled down on your head.

>> Yes, sir.

>> Hello, Davey!

>> Hi, Mr. McLintock!

>> New broom, eh?

>> Sweeps clean!

>> Hello, Bunny!

How is everything?

>> Oh, fine, fine, Mr. McLintock!

I'll get you next time!

(upbeat saloon piano music) >> Two more, Elmer!

Well, look who's here!

>> What'll it be, Mac?

Same as usual?

>> Ladies.

Evening, GW.

>> Jake.

>> Wrong move.

>> Go on.

>> Chess problem.

Queen's in danger.

(door flaps) (horse neighs) >> I suppose you can do that!

>> Camille?

You're on your own.

(door slams violently) >> Mrs. McLintock.

>> Uh, I'm Camille.

Camille Reedbottom?

I'm uh, learnin' the game of chess.

(giggles) Thought it would give me somethin' to pass the time.

See, I have nothing to do all day long.

I just remembered somethin.

(slams down item) >> Katherine!

I didn't hear you come in!

>> Mr. McLintock.

I told you that I wanted to talk to you!

>> Not now.

>> Could I get you a glass of sherry, Katherine?

>> Oh, thank you, Mr. Birnbaum, I could use one.

I came into town behind a runaway team!

>> Drago never could handle horses.

>> It was that young man, whose mother pretends to be your cook!

>> Katherine, your wine.

>> Oh, thank you, Mr. Burnbalm.

Now, Mr. McLintock, we have an awful lot to talk over.

>> First thing I learned about Indian fighting, was to wait for daylight.

>> What has our conversation got to do with Indian fighting?

>> Indian fighting is good experience for our kinda conversations.

>> Oh!

>> It'll wait, Katherine.

>> Evenin', Sarah.

>> Mr. McLintock.

We had quite a ride out here!

>> Oh, I finally got that team settled down.

>> Your move.

>> No, it's your move, I just castled.

>> Oh.

>> Now look here, you're not gonna sit here all night long and play chess, when the matter of our daughter remains unsettled!

>> I am gonna remain here and play chess, and the matter of our daughter is settled!

She stays.

>> Oh, such stubborness!

>> Katherine, your hair!

>> Oh, it is a mess after that awful ride.

>> No, no.

(laughing) The tricks a man's memory will play, eh?

>> Mr. Birnbaum, I think that you've completely lost your mind.

>> You have done something to your hair!

>> I have not!

(laughing hysterically) (chuckling) >> If I had, it'd be none of your business, certainly not gonna put myself in the place of of those blonding trollops that you seem to prefer.

>> Fill it.

>> Oh!

(peaceful music) >> You fellas still at it, all night?

>> McLintock never quits.

>> But a Birnbaum has to.

Besides, the game is over.

You got me.

>> Oh no, Mr. Birnbaum, you still got a good game.

>> Ohh, you play chess?

Please, take over.

(yawning) >> Pretty good?

>> Fair.

>> Wow, looks like I won't have to come into town always, to get a game.

Remember, I'm a bad loser.

It's your move.

>> Yes, sir.

(peaceful violin music) (playful music) >> Good morning.

>> Good morning.

Oh it's not, it's not morning already?

>> Mm hmm.

Cup of coffee?

>> Oh yes, thanks Jake.

>> You're welcome, Katherine.

>> Got any cream?

>> Canned cow's milk.

>> That'll do.

>> Good old condensed milk.

That reminds me, I was cleaning out my desk the other day, I found something I wanted to return to you.

Here it is.

From the President of the United States of America, the first Sargent Michael Patrick Gilhooley.

For bravery, above and beyond the call of duty.

It's your papa.

Reminds me of the first time I ever saw you.

Was over 17 years ago.

Walked into my store, not much bigger than the bundle you were carrying.

And in the bundle was the most beautiful baby I ever saw.

Was she hungry!

(laughing) Walked all the way from Supersition Creek, just to trade me that medal for a case of canned milk.

GW was off somewhere as usual, fighting Indians.

>> Sheriff!

Sheriff Lord!

Have you seen the sheriff?

>> Kinda early for him.

Try his house?

>> Why didn't I think of that?

>> Looks like Birnbaum's is open, maybe somebody in here knows.

>> So there you are, Sheriff!

I told you you were headed for trouble.

>> Trouble?

>> I wanna know by whose authority you let those Indians stay in town.

Those savages are wards of the government, and I am the representative- >> I told Sheriff Lord that he could put 'em up down by the clay slide.

>> Because the town's named after him, he thinks he owns it.

>> Well you check the books and recorder's office, and you'll find I do own a fair piece of it.

Agard, if you knew anything about Indians, you'd know that they're doing their level best to put up with our so-called benevolent patronage, in spite of the nincompoops that have been put in charge of it.

>> Those Indians need my permission to leave the reservation!

>> Those chiefs have been giving orders all their lives, it's pretty hard from them to understand that they have to hold up their hand like a schoolboy in a classroom!

>> The law is very clear.

>> I told you you'd get no satisfaction from these people.

We'll get the girl back.

>> The girl?

>> The girl the Indians kidnapped.

But don't worry, I armed the settlers, and set them to rounding up those red devils.

>> What is this about a girl?

>> Millie Jones, one of the settler's daughters.

>> Indians kidnapped her.

>> That's ridiculous.

And you turn loose a lot of farmers with shotguns?

>> I certainly did.

>> You're insane.

Let's go, Sheriff.

(dramatic music) >> Mr. Douglas.

>> Oh, Mrs. McLintock.

>> Much as I hate to agree with GW about anything, you haven't changed a bit.

You're still a hysterical fool.

(dramatic music) >> Comin to town, I got worried.

>> What about?

>> Thought maybe Katie shot ya.

>> Not yet, Drago, but it took restraint.

>> Wait a minute, you gotta take Agard along, not that he'll be much help.

>> Drago, help him on the horse.

(triumphant western music) >> Just a minute.

(horse neighs) (buggy creaks) >> I'll drive.

>> Yes, ma'am.

(horse neighs angrily) >> Agard, what are you doing?

>> Skritch him, Agard!

>> Agard, this is serious!

Stay with him, Agard!

Stay with him!

>> Agard, will you stop showing off, and get in this buggy?

>> Mercy.

Mercy.

>> That horse is a little green!

>> Let's go.

Yah!

(triumphant music) >> Just where do you think you're going?

>> Don't use that range boss tone of voice with me!

(dramatic music) >> Carter!

Headed for Mr. Poorboy's mine, mount up some riders.

>> Right, boss.

You heard the man.

>> I don't like it, Mr. McLintock.

I don't like it one bit.

>> What don't you like?

>> They're planning to hang an Indian!

(dramatic music) (horses galloping) (groans) >> Woah, sheriff, real funny!

Where's the whiskey?

(makes nervous noise) >> Hold it!

>> Not so fast, Mr. Boss of the whole country!

Unless you wanna wear a big hole in your middle!

>> How long is GW gonna let that Chee-Chalker push him around?

>> That Chee-Chalker has a sawed off shotgun.

>> How do you know she didn't wander off someplace, or meet some feller or somethin?

>> What are you sayin?

That I didn't raise my girl right?

That she'd wander off all night with some man?

>> There's a lot of things I'm not sayin to you, mister, while you got a sawed-off shotgun in my middle!

But how do you know this Indian had anything to do with it?

>> She's gone, ain't she?

She's gone.

>> Pa!

Pa, I'm over here!

Pa!

>> Been lookin' for me, Pa?

>> Where you been, gal?

>> Young Ben took me for a sunrise ride, and the horse wandered away.

(crowd laughing) >> You come down offa there!

>> But Pa!

>> She's tellin' the truth, Mr. McLintock, we wasn't doin nothin!

>> Well that's not important right now.

The important thing is that you don't draw that hog leg, or this'll be worse than Dodge City on Saturday night.

>> You on get back to the wagon!

I'll tend to you later!

Now for this young whippersnapper.

>> Now, no harm has been done.

And young Ben is one of the nicest boys in the territory, so just put down that shotgun- >> Unless he's had a fool with my- (groans) >> Now, we'll all calm down.

>> Boss, he's just a little excited.

>> I know, I know, I'm gonna use good judgment, I haven't lost my temper in 40 years, but pilgrim, you caused a lot of trouble this morning, mighta got somebody killed, and somebody oughta belt you in the mouth, but I won't!

I won't!

The hell I won't!

(punches) (dramatic music) (groans) (splashing) >> McLintock rider!

(punching) (banjo music) (whooping) >> Ha ha!

Oh, Maclan!

>> Hey, Buster!

Remember me?

(groans) >> Hello, sir!

Nice and tidy.

(lively music) >> Do you think you oughta?

I oughta what?

(punching and clamoring) (gasps) >> Why you- (screams) (screams) (lively banjo music) (splashing) >> Wait, I wanna work with you- Hey, just a minute!

What are you gonna do with my glasses?

Hey now, stop this, or you'll be sorry!

(punching) (track rattling) >> Hey!

>> Stay out of this, Jake!

>> It's everybody's war!

(punching) (lively banjo music) (splashing) (groaning and screaming) >> Where's the whiskey?

(solemn music) (lively accordion music) (splashing) >> Where's the whiskey?

Good fight, good fight.

(punching) >> Oh sorry, McLintock.

(groans) >> Ohho, Maclan.

>> Thanks.

(punching) >> Haha, very funny.

>> Yeah, very funny.

(groaning) (gasps) (splashing) >> Gosh, Mr. Douglas, I'm sorry!

(laughing) (trombone sliding note) >> Bon Voyage, Drago!

(trombone sliding note) (punching) (trombone sliding note) (punching) (lively banjo music) >> Are you still down here?

>> Hey!

Horse walkin away, eh?

>> Honest Mr. Jones, honest!

(punches) >> Oh!

Get out of my way.

(punching) >> Nice left.

>> Thanks.

>> I went to college.

>> For this, you don't need college.

>> You're not gettin' me down there!

(trombone sliding note) (gasping) >> Ow!

(trombone sliding note) (splashing) >> Oh!

You did this on purpose!

Oh, why McLintock, you big- >> Good morning to you, Mrs. McLintock.

>> Buddy, you big- >> Yowwwie!

(screams) >> Oh no!

(splashing) >> GW, you great big clumsy- >> Well it's pretty hard to control yourself!

(trombone sliding note) (splashing and shouting) >> Oh, Maclan!

Woah, Maclan!

What a party!

But no whiskey!

We go home.

>> You and your friends!

>> Well, we at least saved your hat!

>> Oh!

(splashing) >> Where is everybody?

Oh, for heaven sakes!

(lighthearted orchestrals) >> Drago: Woah, woah!

>> Kate: Drago, will you never learn how to handle a team?

>> Drago: Yes, ma'am, I'll sure try, I tell ya that.

>> Crummy family!

>> You wanna lose your pigtail?

>> I lose face!

Lousy relatives.

>> You gonna lose more than that.

>> Kate.

>> Yes?

>> We could be a big help to one another.

>> Like what, may I ask?

>> Well, we could wash the mud off of each other, we used to have quite good times, doing that sort of thing.

>> There are a lot of things we used to do.

Good night, Mr. McLintock.

(sighs) (door shutting) >> Any luck?

>> What are you talking about?

>> I mean, divorce!

She still want it?

>> Yeah.

>> You know somethin?

Women are funny.

She faught like a wildcat on your side, out there this afternoon, come home, she slams the door in your face.

That divorce business, is that what you get when you pay a woman not to live with you?

>> That's about it.

>> Some women, I've noted, be worth it.

>> You know, if we had any moral character, we wouldn't be standin' here covered with mud, drinking, when we should be washing!

>> GW.

>> Drago.

(triumphant western music) (peaceful orchestrals) >> Mrs. Warren, these biscuits!

Mmm!

>> Well thank you, Drago.

>> Morning, Mrs. Warren.

>> Good morning, Mr. McLintock.

(peaceful music) >> One poached egg, tea, toast, lightly browned and un- Why, Mrs. McLintock.

You have a black eye!

>> I do- Oooh.

Oh.

Oh, and Becky's coming home today!

>> And that's not all.

There's a little something we'd better get settled.

>> Hmm?

>> There are no men listening now, so we can be ourselves.

Oh sure, I let you get away with all that guff the other night, but now that we're alone- >> When I want the opinion of the hired help, I'll ask for it!

>> You know, you could wind up with two black eyes!

>> What?

>> Oh, I realize you have to put on that big act.

We always have to, just before we get ready to forgive them.

Generally for something they haven't done.

But you and I both know that's just to keep them from gettin' the idea that they uh, run things?

McLintock give you that black eye?

>> No!

Nobody gave it to me!

I won it!

(train whistle) (marching band music) >> Morning Davey!

>> Morning, Mrs. Beech!

Mr. Beech!

(train chugging) (train whistle) (train bell dinging) (marching band music) >> Why, Miss Becky, welcome home!

>> Hello, Mr. Douglas!

>> Hi Becky, how are ya!

>> My boy, haha!

>> Good to see ya again!

>> Daddy, oh!

Daddy!

>> Hahaha!

>> It's been two long years!

>> I guess I'm gonna have to stop callin you tomboy.

>> Becky.

>> Mama!

>> Oh darling.

>> I wasn't sure you'd be here!

>> I've been here a few days.

>> Oh Becky, I've bought you three of the most beautiful dresses- >> Becky!

>> Uncle Drago!

Oh!

>> Did you bring your old uncle a comin home present?

>> Sure did!

>> What is it?

>> A mustache cuff!

>> And what did you get me?

>> The prettiest Palomino pony that ever packed a saddle.

>> Broke the stand tyin it down.

>> Oh!

(low tuba note) >> Uncle Jake!

(giggling) What are you doing with Mr. Douglas' tuba?

>> Oh, Mr. Douglas has a fat- Had a little accident.

>> I brought ya a whole shipment of licorice sticks!

But now that I've seen how much you've grown, I think we'd better exchange 'em for a couple of bolts of dress goods, eh?

>> Thank you.

>> Oh, the mayor was gonna be here.

>> But he territorial capitol on a horse staff matter, but I'm gonna give his speech!

(cheering) Oh, and don't worry about the mayor.

I'm sure that he can find a bill of sale for the horse.

(laughing) Ladies, and gentlemen, we are here to welcome the fairest- What am I doing?

We are here to welcome back the prettiest girl that was ever born in McLintock, or in any part of the territory.

(train blows steam) >> Hey Davey!

>> Yeah?

>> Got somethin' for ya!

(gravel shuffling) Yardmaster up at the junction told me to let 'em ride, so I locked 'em in here.

I've had my scalp a long time.

And I aim to keep it!

(foreboding music) (men speaking foreign language) >> And now she's come back to us.

Gone are the pigtails, but the freckles are still on the prettiest face that was ever born in McLintock.

(natives chanting) >> Hey, that's Puma!

Then it's true!

The government did turn them loose!

>> Good 'ol Puma.

I'll never forget when he brought GW home.

Your father had a hole in his chest, and 104 fever.

Course, they weren't very mannerly about it.

He came past the house at a high lope, and threw him on the doorstep.

Then you do remember them good ol days, don't you, Katie?

>> Katherine.

(natives chanting) >> Yatahey, my friends.

>> All: Yatahey.

>> Puma, honored enemy!

>> Does big McLintock forget, also blood brother?

(chuckles) >> No, I'll never forget that.

>> Old wound.

Does it hurt still?

>> I feel it when it comes on to rain.

Inch higher, and I wouldn't a had to worry.

>> Our big McLintock, that was remembered fight.

(laughing) We return with news.

Our people have more trouble.

You see, I learn good English now, Big McLintock.

Learned in white man's jail.

But we would have you talk our cause at government hearing.

>> I understand Governor Humphrey is gonna preside at that meeting.

Yes, Puma, I'll translate your wishes.

>> Mr. McLintock, could I impose upon you to use your Comanche to tell these- >> Puma is chief of the Comanches, and he speaks English very well.

>> Oh, well.

Your people will have to follow my instructions to the letter, it is the law of the land- >> We go.

>> Well now, just a minute.

For heavens sakes!

(triumphant marching band music) >> You wait here, honey, I'll get the structure.

>> Joining the McLintock party?

>> Sure!

>> Will I see you there, Bets?

>> Of course, Davey, and you can have the first dance.

>> Sis.

>> Don't want any sister of mine talking to strangers.

>> Davey's not a stranger, he clerks in Birnbaum's!

(train chugging away) >> He's an Indian.

>> Darn you, Drago!

Now look what you've done!

>> Baby, this is Devlin Warren, he works for your Papa.

Dev, this is Miss Becky McLintock.

>> Those are my things!

>> Yes, ma'am.

I'd have known you anywhere, Miss Becky.

>> What do you mean?

>> Oh, I mean you look so much like your mother.

Well, even prettier.

>> Well Mister Warren.

Mother's much prettier than I am.

>> Many a fight started with words like that.

Come on, get in the buggy.

>> Hello, Ching!

We got cherry pie for dinner?

>> I'm not cooking!

>> No, he's not.

>> Junior!

>> Yes, Miss Becky?

>> You remember Junior Douglas, Mama?

>> Oh, of course.

How's college?

>> Valedictorian, 95.

>> Congratulations.

Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Douglas, We will see you at the party, of course.

>> Oh, delighted.

>> Well, it'll be pretty hard to keep young men away.

>> Yes, sir.

>> Drago!

>> Yes boss, baggage is all on it!

>> GW!

You remember young Junior.

>> Oh yes.

Like father, like son.

>> Oh ah, Mr. McLintock, I hope you don't think I'm being presumptuous in asking for the honor of calling on Miss Rebecca.

>> Well there she is, ask her yourself.

>> Thank you sir!

>> Ching, now I'm gonna get fired.

Get up outta here!

>> Thank you sir, thank you!

>> Have you no manners?

>> See you at the party, Junior.

>> Yep, yep.

>> Yeah, what?

>> Like father, like son.

>> What did he mean, Matthew?

>> Come on, Ching, grab a root and growl.

(speaking in Cantonese) >> Well, you're doing a good job, Miss McLintock.

>> Thank you, Mrs. Warren.

>> Dev, when you're finished there, go over and help Drago with the beer kegs.

>> Yes, mom.

>> Uh, Dev?

Could you come and help me a minute?

I certainly was surprised to hear you went to college.

>> Why?

>> I don't know.

Junior says Purdue's a good college, for a backwater place like Indiana.

>> Well, he did, indeed?

>> Oh, could you do this?

I can't reach it.

Why didn't you finish college?

>> Lack of funds.

My father got sick, and he had to come out west.

So we took out a homestead.

>> You know, your Mom's sure cute.

It's too bad you didn't inherit her eyes.

>> Well you'd been lucky if you'd inherited a few things from your father.

>> Oh, really?

For instance?

>> Common sense, for instance.

>> Common sense?

>> Yeah, you don't see him being fooled by some dude like Junior Douglas.

>> Junior's not a dude.

He's nifty.

This needs a woman's touch.

And besides, he got a letter at college.

>> What sport?

>> Glee club.

>> Very strenuous.

>> Humph!

(screams) Don't you dare hug me!

>> I have no intention of hugging you.

(shouts exasperatedly) (dramatic music) (lighthearted music) (upbeat music) (people chattering) >> Ladies all look lovely, Katherine.

>> You know, this is a real fine party.

>> Oh, thank you, Ben.

Of course, we had to invite everybody.

Just everybody.

>> Sorry, GW.

This one's mine.

>> Well thank you, Mrs. Warren.

I guess I'll have to be a good host in my own home.

>> Well the next one's yours, Mr. McLintock.

>> Thank you.

(crowd clapping) >> Drago, go and do what I told you to do.

>> Oh, Katie!

>> Katherine, and do as you're told!

>> Oh, Drago, do this, Drago, do that.

>> Yee haw!

People, people, people!

This Douglas feller- >> Drago!

>> Yes, ma'am.

Matt Douglas, Jr. Is going to bring you folks some of the latest terpsichorean dance steps, brand new, brought by him, directly from New York City.

(clapping and cheering) All right, Mr.

Fiddler.

(upbeat music) >> Give me a whiskey.

(speaking Cantonese) What?

>> This turn a 10 gallon party, boss.

We're run out of whiskey.

>> Well I can take care of that.

(speaking Cantonese) (splashing) (punching) >> Indian.

And you still got any ideas about asking my sister to dance?

Get up, and we can do this all over again.

>> Yes!

>> That's enough!

You fought, and it's over!

>> Get out of the way, quit buttin in, Birnbaum!

He's your hired man, not your son!

>> Look, you fought him fair and square!

>> I don't think it was so fair and square.

>> What, you wanna take up where he left off?

>> If I did, you wouldn't find it so easy.

>> Now, we've had enough of this!

>> When are you gonna quit walkin' away?

>> Just as soon as we're out of sight of the party, little lesson I learned back home: don't fight in front of women.

>> Well, we're outta sight now.

>> So we are.

(throwing punches) (smacking) >> Such vulgarity!

Someone should do something about it!

>> You're right.

Absolutely right.

(loud punching) (groans) (crashing) >> You all right, young Ben?

>> I'm all right, Mr. McLintock.

>> Pretty fancy fightin, for a country boy.

>> Two years at Purdue, Mr. McLintock.

On the boxing team.

>> I never thought any farmer could whip me.

But you sure did.

>> Get him cleaned up.

Get him some water, Jake.

>> Yeah.

>> Get yourself cleaned up.

Go ask that girl for a dance.

>> Who?

Oh!

>> I missed one.

>> Where is he, I'll find him, that young whippersnapper.

>> Trouble.

>> Where is that farmer boy?

Where is he?

Where is he, GW?

Oh, so you're the young farmer boy that whipped my nephew.

Well I'm Fauntleroy Sage, young Ben's uncle.

>> Well I'm no farmer, but if you're young Ben's uncle, yes, I whipped him.

And you're intruding.

>> What's intruding mean?

>> Buttin in.

>> Oh, so he's insultin me!

Well then I got another reason for wallopin him, besides on account of him thrashin my nephew, young Ben!

>> Fontleroy, you can't get mixed up in these youngster's quarrel.

>> Family honor.

I can't have said a farmer whipped a Sage!

>> You're twice his size!

>> Don't let that bother ya, Mr. McLintock.

Mr. Fauntleroy insists, I'll just have to teach him the same lesson.

(loud punching) >> Say!

(punching) Sorry, young feller.

(laughing) Hate to have to do that, young fella.

No hard feelings.

>> Not yet.

>> Not yet, what?

>> I mean, that isn't all.

>> Now, wait a minute.

Fauntleroy, we're gonna make this a fair fight.

>> Course we are, course we are, GW.

>> They'll be none of this.

(groans) >> I wouldn't do that, GW.

>> You wouldn't do- >> No, I wouldn't do that!

>> And Dev, I don't want you kickin Fauntleroy in the knees!

(kicks) >> He didn't do no such thing!

>> And none of this nose twisting!

(screams) He's all yours!

(punching) (crashing) >> Where are my glasses?

>> You all right, young feller?

>> Ouch!

I'm all right, if this Indian Agent will stop steppin all over me!

>> GW, you was just funnin me!

>> But I want you to know that boy fought me a fair fight!

>> Well I'm glad to hear that, Fauntleroy.

>> My uncle.

Fauntleroy, whatta ya been doin?

I hope my uncle didn't bother anybody.

>> No bother.

>> I think we'd better join the ladies.

before they get curious, Drago.

>> Fauntleroy!

Let's line em all up for a do-see-do.

>> Jake?

You think tincture of arnica would help?

>> Could be.

Used to help you.

>> Gentlemen, to the medicine cabinet.

(sweet, lighthearted music) >> Good morning, Drago!

>> Good mornin, baby!

>> You seen Daddy?

>> Took off early this mornin, with a scatter gun under his arm, went huntin.

>> Oh.

(triumphant excited music) (gun fires) (horse neighs) Morning, Daddy!

>> Good afternoon.

What gets you out so early?

>> There's something I have to get straight in my mind.

>> Yeah?

What?

>> Mama.

(horse whinnies) Why'd you and Mama stop livin together, Daddy?

Why'd you separate?

Aren't you gonna answer me?

>> No.

>> It's sort of my business, I think.

>> I don't.

(horse neighs) >> Is it another woman?

Usually is.

>> At your age, you'll always know what's usual.

>> Is it Mrs. Warren?

>> Becky, I don't wanna start laying the law down, your first day back home, but I'll have no more such talk.

First time I ever saw Mrs. Warren was last week.

She has a job here at which she's very good.

And I hope you'll have the good manners to not pry into other people's business.

(gun fires) Your mother's and mine.

>> Pretty good shot, Daddy.

Oh, I can understand your trouble, Mama's often so, well, so petulant.

>> Petulant?

You learned a lot of words back east, Becky.

Wish to God they'd a taught you some meanings.

You were only about six months old, when your mother stayed alone with you in the side hut, under eight foot of snow.

While I moved the herd 300 miles south, to try and save it.

Saved about half of it.

You were little more than a year old, at the time of the Great Comanche Raids.

We stood off 500 Plains Indians for nine days.

Petulant, Becky?

I think you'd better go on home.

See that Ching gets those birds.

Becky!

Come here.

(horse neighs) (groaning) There's somethin' I oughta tell you.

Guess now's as good a time as any.

You're gonna have every young buck west of the Missouri around here, tryin' to marry you.

Mostly because you're a handsome philly.

Partly because I own everything in this country, from here to there.

They'll think you're gonna inherit it.

Well, you're not.

I'm gonna leave most of it to, well, to the nation, really, for a park.

Or an old lumber mill, cut down all the trees for houses with leaky roofs.

Nobody'll kill all the beaver for hats for dudes.

Or murder the buffalo for robes.

What I'm gonna give you is a 500 cow spread, on the upper Green River.

Now, that may not seem like much.

But it's more than we had, your mother and I.

Some folks are gonna say I'm doin all this, so I can sit up in the hereafter, and look down on a park named after me.

Or that I was disappointed in you.

Didn't want ya to get all that money.

But the real reason, Becky, is because I love you.

And I want you, and some young man to have what I had.

'Cause all the gold in the United States Treasury, all the harp music in Heaven, can't equal what happens between a man and a woman, with all that growin' together.

I can't explain it any better than that.

>> All right, Daddy.

>> Becky!

>> When you're as old as I am, you'll thank me for this.

>> Daddy, I'm full grown.

I wasn't worryin' about me.

I was thinkin' about you and Mama.

(horse gallops) (sad, heartfelt music) (laughing) >> Oh!

(sighs) >> Well, sir, all three of them fell right out of the carriage!

(ladies laughing) >> Well, it's getting rather late, Becky.

It's bedtime.

>> Oh, mother!

>> Hmm?

>> He brought this.

He must have intended to use it.

>> Oh, well- >> Sing us a song!

>> Well, if you really want me to!

Gosh I haven't played in- >> You know Just Right for Me?

>> Sure!

>> It's the rage, now!

(laughing softly) >> Dev!

What are you doin'?

>> Oh, I uh- I just thought I'd get another cigar.

>> You've got one in your mouth, and two burning in the tray!

>> Nut move.

>> Junior: Fellas want me to play all the time.

(strumming) ♪ You're cuter than a baby steer ♪ ♪ And softer than a mouse's ear ♪ ♪ I want the whole wide world to hear ♪ ♪ You're just right for me ♪ ♪ You're sweeter than ♪ >> Oh, not that rhythm, Junior!

Do it the way they do it at the Plaza!

I know the words!

>> Sure, Becky!

Will you sing with me?

>> Of course!

(strumming banjo) ♪ I love a man who's pretty and smart ♪ ♪ And clever ♪ >> It's your move.

>> Oh.

♪ A man like that will be in my heart forever ♪ ♪ Rain or shine ♪ >> Oh Dev, you're playin' like an amateur!

(Becky singing in background) Let's call it an evening, I'd like to know where your mind is, tonight.

♪ You're sweeter than the early spring ♪ ♪ Exciting ♪ ♪ Or bluebells when ♪ ♪ You make the stars inviting ♪ >> Pretty good.

Voice like her father.

♪ You make a man feel like a king ♪ ♪ Because I'm you're ♪ ♪ Just right for me ♪ ♪ Sweeter than honey ♪ ♪ Finer than wine ♪ ♪ I'm sure they found you ♪ ♪ On that honeysuckle vine ♪ ♪ I would melt in your embrace ♪ ♪ You'd disappear without a trace ♪ ♪ To die like this is no disgrace ♪ ♪ This is the time ♪ ♪ This is the place ♪ ♪ For you're ♪ ♪ Just right for me ♪ (banjo twanging) (clapping) Well, that's so good, I kinda hate to break this up!

But we're gonna have that Indian hearing tomorrow morning- >> Sir, about our conversation earlier this evening, I believe I'd better apologize.

>> Yeah?

>> Yes sir, I've been thinking it over, and when I call you reactionary, well that's, merely my generation's term for your generation.

>> Well, goodnight, sir.

>> Good night, Mrs. McLintock.

>> Good night, and do come again.

>> Good night, Drago.

>> Night.

>> Boss, what's reactionary mean?

>> Me, I guess.

He says that anyone that wanted to sell at a profit was reactionary.

>> Was we reactionaries back in them days, when you was sellin beef cattle for six cents a pound, on the hoof?

>> Well, no use arguing with a college boy.

>> Devlin Warren, if you was my kinda man, you wouldn't let some dude walk off with the prettiest girl west of Denver without out puttin up some kind of fight!

>> Does it show?

Oh, what can I do?

I'm just one of her father's employees!

I'm just a hired hand around here!

>> Every so often, Dev, you spill the strangest ideas.

(horse neighs) Everybody works for somebody.

Me, I work for everybody in these United States, that steps into a butcher's shop for a T-bone steak, and you work for me.

There's not much difference.

>> Daddy, the most terrible thing just happened!

Junior's horse ran away!

The one he rented at the livery stable.

>> You tied up a rented horse by the reigns?

He's probably back in the stall by now!

>> I think we could get Junior something that he could ride.

>> What I'd rather do, Daddy, is drive Junior home in our barouche.

It's a lovely evening, and I'm sure Uncle Drago wouldn't mind driving.

>> I would, and I got the kind of manners, don't keep me from sayin so, just to be polite.

>> I'll drive him home, Mr. McLintock.

And you don't have to come, Miss Becky.

I'll see that he gets home safely.

>> I can take care of myself!

>> You got yourself afoot, didn't ya?

>> Dev, get the carriage.

Drago.

>> I'm going with them.

>> Now you got me wranglin' dudes!

(lighthearted music) >> Miss Becky?

Somebody better help me watch the road.

You know, I'm new around here.

Might take the wrong turnoff!

>> Devlin Warren, you know there isn't a turnoff between here and town!

♪ You disappear without a trace ♪ ♪ To die like this is no disgrace ♪ ♪ This is the time ♪ ♪ This is the place ♪ >> Yah, yah!

>> Devlin Warren, what are you tryin to do, kill us?

>> Rather have your friend drive?

Yah!

(horn sounding) (exciting music) >> Daddy?

Daddy!

I have never been so humiliated in my entire life!

>> I said what I said, and I'll stand by it to the death!

>> Shoot him, Daddy!

Shoot him at once!

>> Why?

>> My honor is at stake!

>> Well now, your honor!

>> Absolutely.

>> He impuned my honor!

>> Impuned, what does that mean?

>> Slander.

He slandered my honor!

>> He did?

>> I said what I said, and I'll stand by it to the death.

>> He admits it, see?

Shoot him!

>> Well what is he admitting to?

>> Well he called me a- I won't even repeat the word!

>> I didn't necessarily call you anything, but I said what I said, and I'll stand by it to the death!

>> Well just for the tally books, what did you say?

>> I said that any girl who would permit a man to kiss her before they're formally engaged is a trollop!

>> He said it again!

Shoot him!

>> Now hold on.

>> No, don't hold on!

If you're my father, if you love me, you'll shoot him.

>> Well, I'm your father.

And I sure love ya.

So- (gun fires) >> Oh, you shot him!

You really shot him!

>> If he dies- >> If he dies, he'll be the first man ever killed with a blank cartridge.

Use this to start the races on the forth.

>> Hey!

I'm on fire!

>> Oh, you poor dear!

>> Poor dear?

You'd a had me shot in cold blood!

>> But it didn't happen!

>> Yelling I insulted you and all, what you need is a good spanking!

>> Oh, Dev!

Daddy!

>> Leave me out of this.

>> I think I'll give you what you deserve!

>> You wouldn't dare!

>> Oh wouldn't I?

(screams) >> You'll think next time before you have someone shot!

This kickin' and yellin' isn't gonna help you!

>> Don't you- Oh Daddy, wait a minute!

Daddy!

(spanking) (screaming) Oh, Daddy, help me!

Ow!

Devlin Warren, I hate you!

I hate you!

Let go of me!

Let me go!

>> GW, was that a shot?

>> Oh!

>> Becky, what happened?

>> He spanked me!

>> You spanked my daughter?

>> Dev.

>> You mean you stood there while that brute beat our daughter?

>> GW, what's happened to you in the last three years?

>> Better part of valor, son.

>> Isn't it enough that you've always treated me like a squaw?

Without subjecting dear, sweet, Becky to this crude, vulgar way of life!

>> You women are always raising hell about one thing, when it's something else you're really sore about!

Don't you think it's about time you told me what put the burr under your saddle about me?

>> I don't intend to stand here, and hold a midnight conversation with an intoxicated man!

(dramatic low music) >> And I am not intoxicated!

(door slams) Yet!

>> Hello, Governor!

>> Hello, Governor!

>> Chief Puma.

>> Yes, Sargent.

Big McLintock, we know you get us fair judgement.

>> You gentlemen follow me.

>> Well, Jake.

>> GW.

>> Well GW, it's been a long time.

>> Not long enough, Cuthbert.

>> Your husband is a rude man.

>> Yes, Cuthbert, I know.

(smacks in back) >> Where you want the Indians, Mr. McLintock?

>> Mr. McLintock is not running this hearing.

>> Sargent, seat those Indians.

>> Yes.

Gentlemen, be seated.

>> Another whole tribe when they come into town!

>> Proceed, Lieutenant.

(gavel bangs) >> This hearing is now in session!

Governor Cuthbert Humphrey is presiding.

>> Good luck, Daddy.

>> I'm afraid it's a packed court.

>> Government edict, number 18.

As ordered that the Comanche Nation be transferred from their present reservation to Fort Sill, it is the government's claim, as filed by Indian Agent Agard, that these chiefs, after being released from prison by a kindly government, did then rouse and insight defiance among the tribe, against said order.

It seems, gentlemen, that although some of these chiefs speak English, Chief Puma is quite at home in our language, they have chosen Mr. McLintock to be their spokesman.

>> I speak for the Comanche, or rather, I offer this translation.

>> Proceed, Mr. McLintock.

>> We are an old people.

And a proud people.

When the white man first came among us, We were as many as the grass is of the prairie.

Now, we are few.

But we are still proud.

For if a man loses pride in manhood, he is nothing.

You tell us now, that if we will let you send us away, to this place called Fort Sill, you will feed us, and care for us.

Let us tell you this: It is the Comanche law that no chief ever eats, Unless first he sees that the pots are full of meat, In the lodges of the widows and orphans.

It is the Comanche way of life.

This that the white man calls charity, Is a fine thing for widows and orphans.

But no warrior can accept it, For if he does, he is no longer a man, And when he is no longer a man, he is nothing.

And better off dead.

You say to the Comanche, You are widows and orphans.

You are not men.

And we, the Comanche say, we would rather be dead.

It will not be a remembered fight when you kill us, because we are few now, and have few weapons.

But we will fight, and we will die Comanche.

>> Thank you, Big McLintock.

>> Am I to gather the Comanche defy the government of the United States?

>> Yes, you may gather that the Comanche defy the United States Government.

Or at least, this commission.

>> Gentlemen.

(gavel bangs) It is the order of this court that that these chiefs be incarcerated until such time as the detachment of United States Cavalry be made available, to escort them and the Comanche Nation to Fort Sill.

(gavel bangs) This court is adjourned.

>> Oh, McLintock!

>> You are important chief amongst these white people!

Sway them!

Have them give us few guns to make the fight worthwhile!

Let us have one last remembered fight for end of Comanche!

>> I almost wish I could arrange that, Puma.

(speaking Comanche) (replying in Comanche) >> Sargent!

>> Yes!

>> Gentlemen!

>> It's sad, these changing times.

>> It isn't the times that are changing, Mama.

(Comanches chanting) >> Hey, GW.

>> Hello, Lem.

(lively banjo music) Bunny!

>> Oh, howdy, McLintock!

Figured you'd be belly-down drunk by now.

>> I've been doin some thinkin drinkin, Bunny.

Is that boxcar still on the siding?

>> Well sure, but- >> But what?

>> I don't like it!

>> You don't, eh?

>> You figure if them Indians get out of there, and lead the cavalry on a wild goose chase, the great white father's gonna get nosy- >> Get nosy, and he'll investigate, and when they find out how that side saddle Governor's been messing things up, they'll give those Indians a fair trial.

>> That's live ammunition in that boxcar!

You know what'll happen if them Indians get some guns in their hands?

Somebody gonna get hurt!

>> Is Puma's word good enough for ya?

>> Well I don't- McLintock, you got yourself a partner.

>> Leave me out of this.

>> Hey, McLintock.

(laughing) >> Good night, Bunny.

Good night, Governor.

(Bunny cackling) >> Governor.

♪ Where is the Katie with her light red hair ♪ ♪ Sweet as the roses on the summer air ♪ ♪ I'll find her somewhere while the moon is high ♪ (horse neighs) ♪ And tell her that I love her ♪ ♪ And I'll love her till I die ♪ Katie!

Katie Gillhooley!

Young master is home!

Katie!

Katie!

Katherine Gilhooley McLintock!

Where is the woman of the house?

>> Mr. McLintock.

>> Oh, there you are- Mrs. Warren, oh good evening.

>> I waited up for you, Mr. McLintock.

>> Oh, how nice.

>> I wanna talk to you about something.

>> Delighted, delighted.

>> 309 times straight.

>> I beg your pardon?

>> 309 times straight without a miss.

Gotta be a record.

>> I suppose so.

Now, Mr. McLintock, what I wanted to say- >> Two pound Stetson, six inch brim, 53 feet in the air!

It's gotta be a record.

>> I'm sure it is, but, the reason- >> Dag nabbit, woman!

Can't you hold that glass still?

>> Of course, sir.

>> Now.

Down the hatch to my world's record.

Down the hatch!

>> Yes, sir.

(low tuba music) >> And now, to the Governor of our territory.

>> The governor of the territory, sir?

>> Now, don't you stick up for him, Mrs. Warren.

You're a fine woman, Mrs. Warren, but you'll certainly go down in my estimation if you stick up for Cuthbert H. Humphrey, Governor of this territory!

>> I don't mean to change- >> Down the hatch!

>> Oh, yes sir.

Down the hatch.

(low tuba music) >> Cuthbert H. Humphrey, Governor of our territory, is a cull.

You know what a cull is, ma'am?

A cull is a specimen that is so worthless, that you have to cut him out of the herd.

Now if all the people in the world were put in one herd, Cuthbert is the one I would throw my rope at.

At whom I would throw my rope at.

Natural-born cull.

Another touch, ma'am?

>> Oh no, sir.

No.

Well I, I don't mind if I do.

>> Good.

Can't walk on one leg.

Oh, I didn't mean to be vulgar, ma'am, can't walk on one limb.

>> It's all right.

>> Sounds silly, only a bird can walk on a limb.

>> You know my wife?

Her name's Kate.

She insists on being called Katherine.

Do you know her?

>> Of course, Mr. McLintock, and that's what I wanted to talk to you- >> Well she thinks that Cuthbert H. Humphrey is panting for her like a bull buffalo at the first green of the spring!

But what Cuthbert is panting for is my money!

(tsks) Don't make me feel like I'm drinking alone, ma'am.

>> Very well, Mr. McLintock.

If you insist.

(dramatic music) Down the hatch!

>> Good.

(lighthearted music) (chugging) >> Mr. McLintock, I have something very important to say to you.

Very important.

(laughs) Guess it'll have to wait 'till the morning.

Toodle.

Oh, it's all right.

It's all right.

Beddy bye-bye!

(laughs) (playful music) Whoops, oh.

>> Mrs. Warren!

(laughing) Let me assist you.

>> Very kind.

(playful drunken music) (both laughing) >> Oh, oh, oh- (screaming) (laughing) >> Whoops!

>> What's going on here?

>> Now Katherine, are you going to believe what you see, or what I tell you?

(sighs) >> Mrs. McLintock, hope you won't misunderstand.

>> It's the first hundred women sitting on his lap that I misunderstood, number 101 is quite simple.

Now GW McLintock, I- (guitar strum) He's gone to sleep.

Just when I know exactly what I want to say to him, he goes to sleep!

>> I waited up to talk to Mr. McLintock.

I wanted to tell him I was quitting.

You see, Sheriff Lord has asked me to marry him, and- >> Well, congratulations!

I don't want to seem prudish, but if you are going to marry Sheriff Lord, it seems that you're sitting on the wrong man's lap!

(guitar strum) (laughing) >> Come on, I'll help you upstairs, and we'll have a long talk about men in general.

>> Ladies!

One moment!

>> Watch out, you'll get us all killed!

>> Oh, whoops!

(screaming) >> Wait a minute ladies, till I catch my breath, and I'll get you up those stairs, as sure as my name is George Washington McLintock- (smashes head) (bottle smashes) (playful lighthearted music) >> You may be quitting, Mrs. Wallace- >> Mrs. Warren.

>> But not tomorrow.

I want my breakfast in bed, I want- >> I know, toast lightly browned.

>> Somebody sure put a knob on my skull.

>> It was Katie.

>> Katie, why?

>> Mrs. Warren was there.

>> Oh.

>> And there you was there.

>> Oh.

>> And there that whiskey bottle was there.

>> And Katie's temper being what Katie's temper is, well, there ya are.

>> Drago, old friend.

>> Huh?

>> My wife does not understand me.

>> Well, she is different in the anatomy.

Come on, I gotta get you upstairs.

Get you ready for that big celebration tomorrow.

>> Watch it!

(groaning) (low tuba music) Drago, I am sleeping in the den.

(marching band music) (firecrackers exploding) (donkeys braying) (children laughing) >> You aint' got no respect for yer elders!

>> Children: Bunny lost the camper!

Bunny lost the camper!

Bunny lost the camper!

Bunny lost the camper!

(children chanting) >> Scallawags!

Hope you get to meet em!

(horse neighs) >> Come on, get him aboard.

Is everybody ready?

>> Man at number five needs a flank sit.

>> Get him one.

>> Let us know when you're ready.

>> Ladies and gentlemen, It is my honor to present to you, the Governor of our territory.

Cuthbert H. Humphrey.

(clapping) >> Thank you, Mayor.

My friends, and citizens of this great territory, this is the ninth consecutive year it has been my privilege and my pleasure to inaugurate the McLintock 4th of July Celebration.

Now, the first event will be the wild horse race.

But, before I fire this shot to start the event, I would like to say a few modest words regarding my stewardship of this great territory.

(explosion booms) (whooping and cheering) (exciting upbeat music) (cheering) >> Woohoo!

Whohoo!

>> All right, Professor Birnbaum.

>> Gentlemen.

(band music playing) >> Here, Crazy Horse!

>> Come on, get 'em lined up, come here, King.

Now boys, you all know the rules.

It's twice around the inside, and once around the outside.

First cowboy that hits that finish line, without bustin that egg, is the winner.

And I caution you boys about some of them eggs, 'cause some of them eggs are last year's holdovers.

All right.

Mount up.

(gun fires) (cheering) >> Katherine, my dear.

You seem to be enjoying yourself.

>> Oh yes.

This is wonderful.

It's the only thing I really do enjoy about this barbaric country, the 4th of July celebration!

>> Well Katherine, I've been here for three days, I haven't heard from you, is anything wrong?

>> Wrong?

>> Well I just hope that it hasn't been necessary for you to say anything to GW.

>> What are you talking about?

>> Katherine, you see, I'm in a rather delicate position, being governor of the territory and all.

I just hope you haven't found it necessary to say anything about- >> About what?

>> About you and me.

(laughing) >> Why you pompous windbag.

Do you think that you're the only man who's ever tried to play patty fingers with me?

Who's ever tried to lure me into the moonlight?

>> Well, no, but I- >> Well I'm a big girl, and I can take care of myself.

My husband knows it!

I can assure you, Governor, that your reputation is untarnished.

Now get out of my way!

(cheering) (horses galloping) (all laughing) >> We got ourselves a winner!

Curly Fletcher!

(clapping) >> Mazel Tov, Curly!

>> Give me the egg.

Disqualified!

(laughing) >> Here you go, Curly.

>> GW, you'll never believe what happened over there- >> What?

>> You smell of beer!

>> Well naturally, I'm drinkin beer!

>> Ladies and Gentlemen, the next event will be a contest between the two bronco-busting champions of our territory.

>> Remember the year I rode in that event?

Wore your garters to hold up my sleeves?

(laughter) We had a bet, and I won it!

>> George Washington McLintock, you are a very crude man!

>> Well I guess so, but that was a rough horse, liked to jarred my insides loose!

But it was worth it!

>> Oh!

>> Three beers!

>> Hurray!

(dramatic dark music) (bin clattering) >> One, two, three!

Go!

(cheering) (exciting music) (cheering) >> Come on, Devie, come on, you got him!

(crowd gasping) >> Damn, Devie, you all right?

>> I guess so.

Nothin' busted but my pride.

>> Well that oughta even things up, farmer.

>> For what?

>> For that sore nose you gave me the other day.

>> Well that ain't what's sore on him!

(laughing) (screaming) (train whistle) (whooping) >> The closing event, is the clap pony race!

The finish line is at the barbecue, so start meanderin!

Come on!

>> Now, what is that, false courage?

(chuckles) Why you know what Douglas does, whenever you use a thing like that!

I want you to get on that horse, get out in front, and stay out in front!

>> I'll be out front, Dad, all the way.

>> Good boy.

>> Now remember, stay out in front!

That Agamemnon's a good horse!

(crowd clamoring) (horses neighing) >> Woah, Agamemnon.

(train chugging and whistling) >> 11:20 and she's all done!

>> Woah, boy!

(train whistle sounding repeatedly) (men shouting) >> Whoa!

Boy!

(dramatic music and cheering) >> Agamemnon!

Come on boy, whoa!

(dramatic music) (guns firing) (idyllic country tune) (explosion booms) (dramatic music) (whooping) (shouting in Comanche) (guns firing) (glass breaking) (guns firing) >> Oh, Maclan!

Best party!

Where's the whiskey?

(glass breaking) >> Whose idea was this stunt?

>> Not, doggone it!

They're my real puss!

(guns firing) >> Oh, oh!

(gasps) (guns firing) (cavalry trumpet blaring) (triumphant music) (galloping) (cavalry trumpet) >> Thinkin that's about all excitement you'd want, for one 4th of July, eh?

>> Puma finally got his way, but I reckon he's ridin out his last war party.

>> He won't get very far.

>> But one thing still has me puzzled: where did they get the guns?

>> I was wondering the same thing.

>> My kidney's been bothering me- >> Bunny.

>> GW, psst.

(laughing) >> What an idiotic joke!

>> Joke, do you think that was a joke?

>> Well, shut up!

Do you want everybody in town to see me?

>> You look good in feathers.

>> Dev, I think they've gone!

>> Yeah.

>> What do you want to do about it?

>> What can I do?

>> Nothin!

Just like you've always done!

(flaps umbrella open) >> How long, GW?

>> How long, what?

>> Katherine.

>> She's been ridin herd on you for two years now.

>> I'm a peaceable man, but my father used to say: you raise your voice, it doesn't do any good, it's time to raise your hand!

>> Well I've been plannin to do somethin about it, I'll have another talk with her.

>> Talk to her?

Talk to her?

Talking won't do any good!

>> Becky, have you seen your- What's been happening around here?

You've got hay all over you.

>> Been some mighty sneaky goins on here, during that raid, Mr. McLintock.

>> Who was it said, only a trollop would kiss a man, before they were formally engaged?

>> Oh, but we are engaged, sir.

>> You are?

>> That is, with your permission.

>> Well, you've got it.

>> Oh, Mrs. Warren?

>> I think it's wonderful.

>> I guess this is the only engagement that ever started off with a spanking!

(laughing) >> Mm hmm.

I reckon Birnbaum is right.

>> All right.

>> Lord bless us, this is gonna be a great day!

>> Doggone it, folks, let's don't let a little old Indian raid wreck up a good barbecue and a rodeo!

(cheering) >> Let's go!

>> You contestants, get ready for the cow pulley race.

(cheering) (knocking) >> Who is it?

>> It's me, let me in.

>> Not now.

(busts down door) >> Right now.

>> Are you insane?

>> I wanna talk to you.

(dramatic music) >> It'll have to wait.

(table clattering) (Kate screaming) >> I've taken all I'm gonna take from you!

>> You are insane!

>> You are going to tell me why you packed up, picked up, and walked out on me!

>> Two years ago, you remember, you came home from Denver, with lipstick all over your- (screams) (crowd laughing) >> Lipstick on my collar.

(crowd laughing) >> I've got the shirts to prove it!

>> Who cares!

>> Why you big- (screams) (dramatic music) (crowd laughing) (dramatic music) >> Katherine!

(crowd laughing) >> GW, you are a ruffian!

>> Cuthbert, you are right.

(crowd laughing) >> Well, what kind of a family is that?

>> The best!

>> And dangerous, fella!

>> Who won the race?

>> Who cares, Agard?

History's being made!

(triumphant music) (crowd laughing) (crowd clamoring) >> Yes, Rufus?

>> I regret to inform you I changed my mind about matrimony!

>> Rufus!

(dramatic music) (fabric tearing) >> Hey!

Mrs. McLintock!

(crowd laughing) >> Kat!

Katherine!

>> Keep em outta here.

>> Everybody out.

(tomatoes smashing) (crashing) (dramatic western music) (crashing) (clattering) >> Looks like GW's buying out the whole store!

I'm afraid you're right!

(crashing) >> Crummy family!

Crummy family!

(GW falls loudly) (door slams) (smashing) >> GW!

(screaming) >> Oh GW!

GW!

GW!

GW!

(screaming) (splashing) (laughter) >> Oh Mrs. McLintock, you're all wet!

>> Am I?

(splashing) (crowd clamoring) >> Young woman, GW.

>> Pardon me.

(screaming) (dramatic music) >> Mrs. McLintock!

You settin' a new style?

(gasps) >> Shh!

(sighs in relief) >> Mr. McLintock!

In here!

(gasps) (window breaking) (crowd laughing) (dramatic music) (Kate screaming) >> If I ever get through this humilation, you'll rue the day you ever met me!

>> Oh, bellyache and fight all you want, it won't do you any good!

You been digging those spurs into me for two years!

Now you're gonna get your comeuppance!

(bell dings) Thanks!

(screaming) >> My father would be proud of you!

(screaming) >> Stop it!

>> Keep it, you may need it.

Now get your divorce.

>> Oh.

>> Home.

Don't spare the horse.

>> Home?

>> You heard me.

>> Don't think you're gonna get rid of me that easy!

>> Yah!

(exciting dramatic music) (crowd laughing) >> No more living in the capitol?

>> No.

>> No more Newport in season?

>> Nope.

>> No more dancing at the Governor's Ball?

>> No, GW.

>> Happy days!

>> 310 times, without a miss.

That's a record.

(trumphant music)